Anyone Else A Hot Mess?

I’d love to say this isn’t a fairly typical story in the Clark household, but having spent years comparing, struggling, and trying to get a grip with life, I have succumbed to the hot mess that I am, and laugh. What’s the best thing for the soul? Laughter! So I thought I would share the events of just the past few hours with you.

It’s ‘bins out’ day today. Feeling extra tired last night, I thought I would go to bed early, and give myself a rare lie-in, by putting them out ready for the morning.

After a long soak in a hot bubble bath, I got into my fresh sheets and started to dose off. Only to be roused 30 minutes later by the rustling of rubbish bags outside.

Leaping out of bed and running to the window, I caught a fox scratching away at my refuse. I opened the window and hissed at it, only for the pest to lie down and gaze up at me, daringly.

To cut a very long story short, after a six hour stand off with said fox, and by now, too tired to sit by the window hissing and spitting, I lay wide awake in bed, with my keys in hand, clicking my car locked and unlocked whenever the rustling began. Determined not to give in, and go down and move the rubbish back into the wheely bins.

Having had less than 30 minutes sleep all night, I gave up early, and promised myself to make the most of the day, despite resembling some kind of zombie. I pulled my gym kit on, and car key still in hand, opened the front door, as I received this text.

Anyway, I am off to sell some personal alarms……

Does Anyone Actually Like Valentine’s Day?

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I hate Valentine’s Day…and I’m a woman!

There I said it…and I bet many of you are breathing a sigh of relief, nodding your heads in agreement. Valentine’s Day is nothing more than a commercial money grab, a perverted holiday marketed by the greetings card companies that leaves most of us feeling lonely or inadequate.

It’s my second worst day of the year after New Year’s Eve. But at least Hogmanay is an excuse to get completely smashed and sob your heart out with others, singing about years gone by and drowning your sorrows with a whiskey and a god awful rendition of Auld Lang Syne as the clock strikes midnight.

On Valentine’s Day, however, the pressure is on to be that sweet, demure well-behaved love goddess who makes an appearance once every 12 months before reverting back to that normal foul-mouthed, badass trouble-making babe by mid-morning on 15th Feb.

If it wasn’t bad enough before (and it was), the bar has been raised further in this era of Instagram and Facebook. That endless competition for the most Insta-worthy gifts is so incessant, it has forced my daughter and her mates to come offline until it’s over.

And, of course, everything is so over-priced. Restaurants charge more (because they can) and the service is never as good as the rest of the year. We’re crammed in with other fake couples staring gooey eyed at each other, pretending they weren’t there, or arguing over him banging her best mate, or whose turn it is to unload the dishwasher later on.

It’s a shallow, rootless, artificial holiday; the facade is all romance but the reality is all capitalism. It’s a billion-pound industry. People in relationships buy each other expensive gifts, and single people buy themselves Haagen Daaz and a bottle of Malbec to commiserate (or secretly celebrate) singledom.

Okay, cynical rant over. Still, on the upside, my excitement for Pancake Day is starting to build.

I shall leave you with these gorgeous heart shaped sparkly personal alarms. If you do still have to purchase something for your loved ones this Valentine’s, you might as well make it something useful.

And they look fab on Instagram too…..

 

Do Personal Alarms Work?

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Personal Safety Alarms are designed to emit a loud noise when triggered. This alarm is a high-decibel noise that’s meant to warn other people that someone needs help.

The noise can register at up to about 130 dB. That’s a lot of noise if you consider that a train whistle only registers to about 90 dB.

Using this much noise against a potential attacker and you will cause panic or momentary confusion, as well as alerting others within earshot.

Crimes such as mugging and individual attacks are mostly  committed after dark, and given the natural curiosity of people, the attacker is immediately faced with the chance of being confronted by the public or a police officer.

Therefore, the chances of being left enough time to complete the attack are drastically cut.

As well as the practical safety reasons for carrying a personal alarm, most women report feeling safer and more confident just knowing they have one on their person. Because of this, we at SafeGirl have come up with some beautiful, stylish safety products any fashionable female would be proud to show off.